If I ever had a doubt that people are thankful for very different things, it became crystal clear while watching Rachael Ray one day last year.
She did a segment on helping guys pick out flowers for the women in their lives and it began with the notion that flowers from the grocery or convenience store are a no-no. From the comments being made, you would have thought that was the equivalent of handing a woman a pile of cow manure.
It elicited a “wow” from me and I remember shaking my head in disbelief. I talked to a few women about it and they couldn’t imagine a guy handing them flowers at the end of the day and feeling anything other than sheer gratitude. Which made me thankful I surround myself with people who appreciate sweet gestures and life’s blessings.
And so that brings me to Thanksgiving, families and the world of retail. One person’s blessing is another’s curse. This is especially true for that quasi-national holiday, Black Friday.
A dear cousin recently asked me to take the greedy retailers to task in a column and I had to, in good conscience, respond by telling her that would make me the ultimate hypocrite. My sister and I have been making a sacred tradition of shopping that day for a long time and we have already had several strategy conversations relating to it.
We hear the naysayers’ comments every year and just shrug them off. We don’t go to places that sell flat-screen televisions or give away fancy gadgets to the first 100 people at the door, so last year’s horrific incident where a Wal-Mart employee was trampled to death is completely foreign to our experience. What we see in our interactions is mostly people sharing coupons and enjoying the hunt. No frenzy, just sisterhood at its finest.
But that brings me back to my cousin, whose point about the retailers is understandable because it’s coming from the heart. Her tradition of her family (a daughter, a son, and a boyfriend) spending Thanksgiving at her mother’s house with the rest of their family isn’t going to work this year because her daughter and boyfriend work in retail. He has to open the store at 5 a.m. on Friday and she is working until midnight; the travel would be too much.
Having worked many a Thanksgiving myself, both in retail and as a sports writer, I was fortunate to be in close enough proximity to the big family gathering to make it for at least part of the day. My sister, who runs the daycare at a health club, is actually working Thanksgiving morning this year so its members can still work out despite the holiday (go figure).
My cousin’s final point is apt here.
“I don’t want to deny people that ‘fun,’” she writes. “I just wish the consumer would appreciate it more ... the sacrifices that are made not only by the employee, but their family members too!”
Amen.
How about that brand of gratitude? The people who make our holiday weekend festivities/traditions possible by their work don’t need to hear whining or carping and they certainly don’t need to be referees when two people are fighting over the latest trendy toy. They don’t get paid enough for any of the above. Most of them know that in this economy there’s reason to be thankful that they have a job, any job. Some of them even welcome extra hours because they can use the money.
Of course it’s a given that gratitude is individual. Not just what we’re grateful for, but if we’re grateful at all.
Now that’s something to think about, isn’t it?
Nancy Colasurdo is a practicing life coach and freelance writer. Her Web site is www.nancola.com. Please direct all questions/comments to FOXGamePlan@gmail.com.
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