At the same time we as life coaches are helping people to figure out how to simplify their lives, one of the hot stories in the news this week is about a 13-year-old girl who sent over 14,000 text messages in a month, including texting her best friend who was sitting right next to her at her own karaoke party.
I admit I am a dinosaur when it comes to technology. I know texting is "the thing." I’m not that out of touch, despite resisting it thus far. But this story, which originated in an article written by the girl’s father in the Orange Country Register, gave me a clearer picture of the heightened challenges we now have in trying to simplify our lives in these rocky economic times.
It’s one thing for a 40-something adult to consciously decide to scale back, but asking an insecure adolescent (redundant?) to not hang on every word her BFF says at the very minute it reaches her phone must be an excruciating undertaking. This is what they know and what they do to stay connected.
But since they’re not the ones I’m coaching or the ones reading this column, let’s take it back to a saner, more adult place. Is technology consuming you, or are you using it to streamline your life?
I am in that 40-something generation that seems pretty divided on the technology issue. For example, as an urban dweller and journalist, I am much more married to email than most of my suburban mother friends who are my age. Yet they are usually more adept at texting because they learned it to keep in touch with their children.
I have also found the adults in my acquaintance divided on social networking Web sites. A year ago, when anyone suggested I get on Facebook, my standard reply was, “I like you, but I really don’t care what movie you saw last night.” Well, in a year I’ve become a complete convert. I am not inclined to join groups on there or send people funky cocktails, but what I have realized since caving in to join it in the spring is that it is a marvelous way to keep in touch with very little effort.
I recently had a conversation with someone on the subway about the common belief that social media hinders or reduces real face-to-face socializing. While there is a potential for that, I find that five minutes a day is the perfect amount of time to update my “status” -- a fun form of expression -- and glance at what my “friends” are doing and that serves to enhance subsequent face-to-face time.
For instance, I recently ran into a friend I hadn’t seen in about a year. The first thing I did was remark on how cute her kids are. She looked at me quizzically, but then I said, “Facebook.” Two weeks later, I bumped into another friend I hadn’t seen since she moved away. I told her it seemed like she was really enjoying life out of the city, apple picking and such. Again, pure Facebook.
Even better, a few weeks ago one of my friends posted in her status that she was freezing because there was no heat in her apartment. It just so happens she and her husband live two doors from me. I called and offered them my portable heater, which they were thrilled to get. In her next status post, she wrote that it was 15 degrees warmer thanks to the heater and Facebook.
My point here? This is from five minutes a day on a social media site. I would never be able to keep up with lots of terrific people if I had to find time to talk to each one individually on a regular basis. This works for me.
In her latest book, Secrets of Simplicity, author Mary Carlomagno offers some things to keep in mind as you assess this area of your life:
Any technology you choose should save you time, not take more of your time.Set boundaries for cell phone and BlackBerry use by scheduling blocks of time during which you turn off these devicesEveryone’s work flow and life priorities are different, so choose technology that will best help achieve your unique goals.I have an entrepreneur friend who feels liberated by her BlackBerry because it allows her freedom of movement. But I also have a client who refuses to own one because she fears work would start to feel like an albatross around her neck if she could be “tracked down.” Neither is right or wrong; it’s about what feels right for the individual.
As for the aforementioned thousands of text messages and the challenge that presents to parents, best of luck there. I just found out we live in a time where, seriously, you can buy a toy version of a security checkpoint like the ones at the airport (Playmobil, recommended for children ages 4-7, on Amazon.com for $55).
Yikes. With terrorism and technology on our plates, trust me -- simplifying can feel like a much-needed deep breath.
Nancy Colasurdo is a practicing life coach and freelance writer. Her Web site is www.nancola.com. Please direct all questions/comments to FOXGamePlan@gmail.com.
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